It is hard to continue writing on my Journal, but its always here.
Lord, hear my cry.
My mind struggles to understand that i must follow my heart.
Those around me see you, yet do they?
Is my hope, for myself, or is it more?
I feel like i am thinking beyond myself, yet do I?
Do i seek your glory, or do i seek worldly glory?
Do i seek your will or do i try to make something that others have?
I thought i understood, but i dont.
I saw what was in front of me yet it attacks me.
I feel drained. I feel helpless. I feel alive and awake.
I feel that i need you even more. But yet do i understand?
What do i need to understand? I believe what you say, yet with this
they do not.
I want to move away, yet i want to fight.
How do i fight? Wait i take that back, but how can i feel you when i am still.
The lions surround me. Blessings are possible, yet the beast is on the hunt.
He is hunting. He is winning. The darkness is falling.
As quick as the light shined, the darkness arrived.
Like the song being played right now.
I am hanging on to every Word you say.
Every word you speak. Everything you have done.
Being here is like a prison. To share you, is difficult.
Its as what i say about you is just a story.
Not a fact.
What makes a persons heart open. How Lord?
Christ your power is beyond measure in which i cannot stand.
I fall down knowing that you are Holy.
Truly Lord this life is and should between me and you.
I cannot cut away my sins, but you are forgiver of all.
You can only make me pure as white snow.
Only you can read my emotions and know how to deal with it.
They Word that is meant to be our daily bread, help me truly look at it with hunger.
The darkness comes and goes, but you are beyond it.
Protect me with your almighty love.
The prayers that let Peter free, help set me free.
Christ please pray for me.
Please just take me.
Hold me close.
Watch me.
Save me.
Love me.
Huge me.
Be me.