Lead Me 2

Father when i ask you to Lead Me, i truly do not know what i mean by that. This way of thinking is difficult, because i want to focus on you only, but its hard, because of the physical. I ask you Lord, by your commandments that i will use them as a sense of fear to love and know Your glory. I am chasing two dreams right now that seem so far to accomplish or even one is so clouded that i find it hard to see how i will even make it. You know how much i crave this situation, but i cannot do this alone and do this correct. I truly do not understand to trust You. What is this fear of not fearing You? I mean that would be one way of putting into words. I find it so difficult to trust, when i know you have answered before. I guess truly there wont ever be a situation in which i will never doubt you. Do you think i doubt you? Or is it that i dont doubt, but rather over think and let my emotions and weaknesses eat me? You know my heart Lord. It is twisted but there is something that tells me to be focused on you. I guess thats why i am not alright. I am lost in my thoughts and my failures. I need you to lead me Lord, but my heart feels so weird to ask you. I do not know Lord. I like to be lead by You, but then i find it so difficult to understand my thoughts and heart. I am not alright Lord and i am broken. I will never be completed until you come and fill me fully. I thank you for just being the Loving(and everything that falls under love) Father, Brother, God, Savior, Healer, Christ. I would not know where i would be without you. I wouldnt understand your Love and the purpose you give us in this life. I love you Lord and find it so though to know what that means. I tell myself this, but man. I do i do it? I do i see it that i do not lose focus completely? I know i will lose it, but help me deal with that when i lose it. Help me deal with that fact when i am down, that you will comfort me. Help me to trust you in the most difficult parts of my life. Help me to be patient where i am not. Help me not be jealous when i am? Help me fallow you and your laws. Help me be the light that shines from you. Help me be led by you. Help me. Help me. Show me. Guide me. Teach me. Be gentle Lord. Be aware of my heart and how much it is willing to blow into stupidity and into satan's hands, when you are more powerful. Lead me. Lead my family. Lead my church. Lead my friends. Lead my love one's. Lead my hopes. Lead my dreams. Lead my hands. Lead my words. Lead my life. Lead my world. Lead it Christ. Be the Leader of what is Yours, but help me understand. Please. Amen.